longevity vs. popularity as a metric of quality

a tiny play

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A DONUT talks to CRONUT in the display case at a bakery.

DONUT: You’re not better than me.

CRONUT: No.

DONUT: You’re not.

CRONUT: Correct.

DONUT: But people want you more.

CRONUT: Not always.

DONUT: They do. You’re just trendy, though. You’re not better.

CRONUT: That seems right.

DONUT: Actually I’m better than you.

CRONUT: Also no.

DONUT: I am.

CRONUT: No.

DONUT: I’ve been around longer, so-

CRONUT: That doesn’t mean anything.

DONUT: Yes it does. It means I’m better than you.

CRONUT: No. It means you’ve been around longer.

DONUT: Which means-

CRONUT: Nope.

DONUT: But-

CRONUT: Nah ah.

DONUT: —

CRONUT: —

DONUT: Hmm.

CRONUT: Hey, Rob?

DONUT: Yeah?

CRONUT: You’re kind of a bitch.

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