Codependent (End of Life Play)
My First Script
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PERRY and WILLIAM are in their late seventies. They sit in matching chairs on their lawn and star gaze.
PERRY: Coney Island.
WILLIAM: Mykonos.
PERRY: Taipei.
WILLIAM: Budapest.
PERRY: Galapagos.
WILLIAM: Brisbane...’66, not ’94.
PERRY: Of course. ’66 every time.
WILLIAM: We never made it across to Perth. Why?
PERRY: Cadillac.
WILLIAM: Pardon?
PERRY: Cadillac. The old Datsun we bought for the month we stayed there died.
WILLIAM: Cadillac! Because it was so "classy."
PERRY: You spoke in tongues for two weeks because of that car.
WILLIAM: We were ripped off.
PERRY: We knew we’d been ripped off before we gave that old woman the money.
WILLIAM: Adventure.
PERRY: Verbatim.
WILLIAM: Rip off.
PERRY: Verbatim.
WILLIAM: We should get there.
PERRY: Perth?
WILLIAM: We never made it.
PERRY: We never made it to Cairo...Trinidad.
WILLIAM: Florence.
PERRY: Why Perth?
WILLIAM: Cadillac.
PERRY: Relevance?
WILLIAM: Revenge.
PERRY: Waning-age Crisis. Classic denial of ability and energy.
WILLIAM: Finely aged, yes, but energy is certainly not of the problems we face.
PERRY: Abilities.
WILLIAM: What abilities? We get on a plane. We fly again.
PERRY: And once we’re there? We sight-see with my walker and your every hour on-the-hour urination schedule? Sounds brilliant.
WILLIAM: Old Fart.
PERRY: What?
WILLIAM: It’s code for "You’re old and have no sense of adventure."
PERRY: Old.
WILLIAM: Decrepit.
PERRY: Limp.
WILLIAM: Half buried.
PERRY: Don’t push me.
WILLIAM: You told me to push. Fifteen years ago, when we got old.
PERRY: Now I’m too old. Don’t push me.
WILLIAM: You said you’d say that.
PERRY: Stop.
WILLIAM: I’m calling Sid for tickets.
PERRY: I’m not going.
WILLIAM: I’ll pack for you. You’re going.
PERRY: I’m not.
WILLIAM: Perth!
PERRY: Perth.
WILLIAM: Perth.
PERRY: Why Perth?
WILLIAM: Proof.
PERRY: Revenge.
WILLIAM: We’ve got more.
PERRY: I’m afraid.
WILLIAM: Okay.
PERRY: Content.
WILLIAM: You’ve never been content with anything in your life.
PERRY: Not even you.
WILLIAM: So don’t lie to me.
PERRY: I’ll go.
WILLIAM: We’re going.
PERRY: I have to go.
WILLIAM: We’re going.
PERRY: We’re going. Are we going to Cairo? Florence?
WILLIAM: Sure.
PERRY: How?
WILLIAM: Pension.
PERRY: Mine or yours?
WILLIAM: You don’t have Pension.
PERRY: I have Pension.
WILLIAM: You have Children who buy you things.
PERRY: Right. Pension.
WILLIAM: Inverse child support.
PERRY: Your pension then.
WILLIAM: At least at first.
PERRY: Then?
WILLIAM: Bake sale.
PERRY: Can we?
WILLIAM: Don’t mock me.
PERRY: I’ll break out the taps from the attic, and we can collect coins in town.
WILLIAM: And then? We’ve never been to Vail.
PERRY: Really? You have the frame from that resort.
WILLIAM: Your daughter last Christmas.
PERRY: She’s sweet.
WILLIAM: She’s loaded. No bake-sale required.
PERRY: She’s Pregnant.
WILLIAM: Again.
PERRY: Always.
WILLIAM: Vail after Perth.
PERRY: Perth again.
WILLIAM: I’m so excited.
PERRY: You’re giddy.
WILLIAM: I’m giddy.
PERRY: Despite it all?
WILLIAM: Despite all of everything that has ever been a thing.
PERRY: Eloquent.
WILLIAM: You can trust me.
PERRY: I can’t.
WILLIAM: You can’t.
PERRY: I have to.
—
Living Room.
WILLIAM stands up and leaves the room. He brings in two pre-packed suitcases. He opens them and sets them on the floor by their feet. WILLIAM takes his place next to PERRY.
PERRY: You overpack.
WILLIAM: I’m a packer. Special skills.
PERRY: Kaylin overpacks.
WILLIAM: Kaylin packs for thirteen bodies every time she leaves the house. Is it thirteen?
PERRY: It’s two. Three. It’s Three soon.
WILLIAM: It’s three. The little one won’t count until it needs a Birthday present.
PERRY: Three.
WILLIAM: Glad Ontario is not the last. I was worried.
PERRY: Didn’t love Ontario?
WILLIAM: Ontario was perfect, but Canada has much less fervor than The Outback.
PERRY: Perth isn’t exactly The Outback.
WILLIAM: It’s Outback. Back out. Back out into the world again.
PERRY: Simpleton. Got your toilet bag?
WILLIAM: No. Where is my toilet bag? I’ve lost it, I think.
PERRY:(pointing at a baggie in the suitcase) Found it.
WILLIAM: Comedic. Strange place to lose a toilet bag.
PERRY: Strange place to find a toilet bag. I didn’t put it there. You did.
WILLIAM: I did.
PERRY: No problem. We found it.
WILLIAM: Found my book.
WILLIAM grabs a copy of WAR AND PEACE off the top of his suitcase. He feigns weakness while lifting it. Perry gives him a loving hand.
PERRY: You didn’t lose your book.
WILLIAM: I’m naming my first-born Pierre.
PERRY: Don’t.
WILLIAM: Don’t name him Pierre?
PERRY: Don’t pretend that’s possible. Old age might allow us to fly, but not swim.
WILLIAM: Give me a break.
PERRY: Tried that, remember?
WILLIAM: That’s fair. Time out is over.
PERRY: I’ve been thinking. I’m glad we’re going. I’m going. I’m glad about it.
WILLIAM: And I knew you would be.
PERRY: I’m scared. I’m glad.
WILLIAM: You’re discontent.
PERRY: Content wasn’t accurate.
WILLIAM: And I knew that.
PERRY: I’ve missed the Roos.
WILLIAM: They’re everywhere. Aussie equivalent to mosquitoes or squirrels.
PERRY: I love the Roos.
(A small silence)
WILLIAM: "It seemed to Pierre that it was in full harmony with what was in his softened and emboldened heart, that had gained vigor to blossom into a new life."
PERRY: What?
WILLIAM: This. Doesn’t that just seem to fit? I think it’s very fitting.
PERRY: Indeed. How much left?
WILLIAM: Tolstoy’s masterpiece. At least a million pages to go.
PERRY: Broken legs and cheers to you then.
—
Airplane.
Perry chugs a stiff drink. They are on the airplane.
WILLIAM: Slow down. If you keep drinking like that, it is liable to kill you.
PERRY: (Cracking his neck and knuckles) Leave me alone… I miss first class.
WILLIAM: First class misses you.
PERRY: I really miss first class.
WILLIAM: You miss having your own space.
PERRY: I miss my space.
WILLIAM: The suite has two bedrooms. You can get one all to yourself.
PERRY: Grand.
WILLIAM: Where do you want to go first?
PERRY: First.
WILLIAM: As opposed to last.
PERRY: First, when?
WILLIAM: When we get there.
PERRY: Oh! Swan Valley.
WILLIAM: Wine country.
PERRY: Wine country.
WILLIAM: There’s a nice change of pace. Less gin.
PERRY: I’m going with Bordeaux.
WILLIAM: Any whites at all?
PERRY: Who am I?
WILLIAM: Perry.
PERRY: Perry.
WILLIAM: Always.
PERRY: Reds only.
WILLIAM: Yes, Perry. Reds forever.
PERRY: Unless it’s gin.
WILLIAM: After Swan Valley.
PERRY: Beach bum.
WILLIAM: There we go. We stake out a good spot on the sand, set up the umbrella and vegge.
PERRY: Wait.
WILLIAM: Done.
PERRY: The zoo!
WILLIAM: Another Zoo?
PERRY: I love the roos.
WILLIAM: We won’t need to go to a zoo for roos.
PERRY: I want the zoo.
WILLIAM: Oh you do, do you?
PERRY: I do. You do too.
WILLIAM: I do?
PERRY: Yes, you do.
WILLIAM: No, I don’t. Animals… meh.
PERRY: No, no, no.
WILLIAM: Do we have to?
PERRY: I have to.
WILLIAM: I don’t?
PERRY: …Don’t you?
WILLIAM: I’m...I’m not really sure.
PERRY: Do you?
WILLIAM: I could stay on the beach.
PERRY: You mean, you could stay. I could go.
WILLIAM: No…
PERRY: It is possible.
WILLIAM: Since when?
PERRY: I don’t know.
WILLIAM: This seems like new information.
PERRY: It does.
WILLIAM: Has it always been possible?
PERRY: Perhaps.
WILLIAM: Did I have to go with you to Notre Dame when I wanted to be at the Arch?
PERRY: I guess not.
WILLIAM: But I went.
PERRY: I don’t know why.
WILLIAM: Because we’re together.
PERRY: Most of the time.
WILLIAM: But we don’t have to be together-together for all minutes.
PERRY: No…You’ll want to go to the zoo. You’ll see.
WILLIAM: I will?
PERRY: You’ll like the zoo.
WILLIAM: I don’t like animals.
PERRY: You will like this zoo.
WILLIAM: How do you know?
PERRY: Because I will love this zoo.
WILLIAM: And I love what you love.
PERRY: And I love what you love.
WILLIAM: Except for Eggplant.
PERRY: Delicious.
WILLIAM: Disastrous.
PERRY: It’s filling.
WILLIAM: Its texture is repulsive.
PERRY: There will not be any eggplant in Perth.
WILLIAM: You don’t know that! They could be following us.
PERRY: No, eggplant won’t be at the zoo.
WILLIAM: Then I’ll go.
PERRY: I know.
WILLIAM: But only if I want to at the time.
PERRY: You’ll want to.
WILLIAM: I’d want to go now. Right exactly now. But I can’t guarantee.
PERRY: We’ll have to wait and find out.
WILLIAM: Always.
PERRY: Waiting… Will the damn plane ever take off?
WILLIAM: We leave at six.
PERRY: We always leave at six.
WILLIAM: We left at nine for Ontario.
PERRY: Nine for Ontario.
WILLIAM: Damn Ontario!
PERRY: Let it be.
WILLIAM: Letting it be. (Damn Ontario.)
PERRY: Perth now.
WILLIAM: Until then?
PERRY: We go back to our reading.
WILLIAM: You don’t have a book.
PERRY: You can read to me.
WILLIAM: War and Peace? Are you serious?
PERRY: Just do it with some flare.
WILLIAM: I will not.
PERRY: You’re the worst.
WILLIAM: Don’t.
PERRY: I didn’t.
WILLIAM: Don’t play the "I hate you" game.
PERRY: You love that game.
WILLIAM: Stop it.
PERRY: If you liked me, you would play.
WILLIAM: I’m not playing.
PERRY: Because you hate me.
WILLIAM: Fine, I hate you.
PERRY: Sad life.
WILLIAM: Worst life.
PERRY: …You shouldn’t hate me.
WILLIAM: Why is that?
PERRY: The roos.
WILLIAM: I hate the roos.
PERRY: You can’t hate everything.
WILLIAM: Can too.
PERRY: If you hate me, then you can’t hate the roos.
WILLIAM: I sure can.
PERRY: You must choose, Sophie.
WILLIAM: I have no obligations.
PERRY: Choose.
WILLIAM: I hate the roos.
PERRY: You love me.
WILLIAM: I love something.
PERRY: It’s my charm.
WILLIAM: It’s your charm.
PERRY: It’s refreshing.
—
The Hotel - Perth
PERRY: Sometimes the hotels get me down a bit.
WILLIAM: Because of the soaps.
PERRY: The soaps are different here.
WILLIAM: Where?
PERRY: Perth.
WILLIAM: Perth.
PERRY: Softer somehow.
WILLIAM: We’ll bring our own soaps next time.
PERRY: Perth. We made it. We finally made it.
WILLIAM: I think not. Not yet.
PERRY: When will you be ready?
WILLIAM: I’m ready. Wait. Ready for what?
PERRY: Why do you respond if you don’t understand what I’m talking about?
WILLIAM: I just assumed.
PERRY: What do they say about assuming?
WILLIAM: Shhh. Ready for what?
PERRY: (Jumps like a kangaroo)
WILLIAM: Oh. I think I’m not going to come.
PERRY: You’re kidding.
WILLIAM: I’m not.
PERRY: Will, come with me.
WILLIAM: I’ve decided not to go.
PERRY: You’ll go.
WILLIAM: No. I don’t care to.
PERRY: Will you come with me?
WILLIAM: I can stay on the beach.
PERRY: You can.
WILLIAM: I can stay on the beach if I’d like to.
PERRY: We’ve stayed on the beach for a day already.
WILLIAM: I would like one more day.
PERRY: I would like to see the Zoo.
WILLIAM: I understand.
PERRY: Yet you’re staying.
WILLIAM: I would like to stay.
PERRY: When did you decide to stay?
WILLIAM: (Silence)
PERRY: I’d like you to come.
WILLIAM: You’d like that, but I don’t have to.
PERRY: I’d rather share.
WILLIAM: I’d rather stay on the beach.
PERRY: Did I do something?
WILLIAM: You don’t know what you’re saying.
PERRY: Fine, I’m not going.
WILLIAM: No, you love the Roos.
PERRY: Yes, I love the Roos. Come with me.
WILLIAM: No, I’m not going.
PERRY: Yes, you’re horrible.
WILLIAM: Horrible.
PERRY: Cancerous.
WILLIAM: Touchy subject!
PERRY: You brought me here.
WILLIAM: You said you were glad. Glad we decided to go.
PERRY: Yes. I’m glad we came.
WILLIAM: Me too. I’m relaxing. We’re here. Perth.
PERRY: I suppose.
WILLIAM: Just go. Have your day at the zoo.
PERRY: Even though-
WILLIAM: You go. Enjoy yourself. You’ll have fun.
PERRY: I could go. I’m going…
WILLIAM: Have fun.
PERRY: I’ll go.
WILLIAM: Yes.
PERRY: You’ll stay.
WILLIAM: Yes.
PERRY: Normative behavior obsolete.
WILLIAM: Don’t get worked up.
PERRY: I’m placid.
—
Perth.
PERRY wanders around Perth alone.
He takes a few pictures, looks at a map, takes in the sun. He visits the zoo. He has a moment of real pleasure. He looks for someone to share the moment with, but finds himself alone.
—
An in-between space.
PERRY enters the living room to find WILLIAM sleeping. PERRY kicks WILLIAM’s foot to wake him.
WILLIAM: Perry.
PERRY: Hi.
WILLIAM: Welcome back.
PERRY: Glad I could make it.
WILLIAM: You were gone the whole day. So long. I was going to-
PERRY: It’s dark.
WILLIAM: The entire day.
PERRY: ’Til the dark time.
WILLIAM: Where were you.
PERRY: The zoo.
WILLIAM: All day?
PERRY: No.
WILLIAM: Well, where were you then?
PERRY: The hospital. I’m broken. I broke myself.
WILLIAM: Pear. What?
PERRY: I broke myself. You deaf now too?
WILLIAM: How did you break yourself?
PERRY: I went to the zoo. I went to Perth. Alone.
WILLIAM: But what happened?
PERRY: I went to the zoo.
WILLIAM: I know...
PERRY: Feel bad?
WILLIAM: Why would I feel bad?
PERRY: Because you broke me.
WILLIAM: I broke you?
PERRY: You left me alone.
WILLIAM: I didn’t break you.
PERRY: You could have helped me.
WILLIAM: What happened? How did you break yourself?
PERRY: It doesn’t matter. The point is that I wouldn’t have spent half my day in an Aussie E.R.
WILLIAM: Pear.
PERRY: If you’d been there
WILLIAM: You seem out of sorts.
PERRY: I didn’t know how to be happy without you.
—
Living Room (home)
WILLIAM: You’re at home.
PERRY: At the zoo-
WILLIAM: Chicago.
PERRY: I wouldn’t have broken myself! I asked you. I pleaded, William.
WILLIAM: You got hurt.
PERRY: I didn’t plan on it.
WILLIAM: But this is why.
PERRY: What?
WILLIAM: This is why- let me explain.
PERRY: You’ve done enough.
WILLIAM: We need each other.
PERRY: We need each other.
WILLIAM: We need each other.
PERRY: Elaborate.
WILLIAM: We are at home. Not Perth.
PERRY: You don’t have to say anything.
WILLIAM: We left for Perth seven years ago.
PERRY: Stop this.
WILLIAM: Perry.
PERRY: I miss my space too sometimes.
WILLIAM: Me too sometimes. But I like to keep connected.
PERRY: But you’re not broken.
WILLIAM: We depend on each other.
PERRY: I don’t depend on anyone.
WILLIAM: You do. You depend on me.
PERRY: I blame you. I don’t depend on you.
WILLIAM: Okay.
PERRY: Different.
WILLIAM: You’re not listening at all.
PERRY: I wanted your company.
WILLIAM: You have my company.
PERRY: What you always wanted.
WILLIAM: I wanted it.
PERRY: I wanted it, too.
WILLIAM: I want it.
PERRY: I want it. What is it?
WILLIAM: Just you, Perry.
PERRY: I wanted your company.
WILLIAM: But- I wish you were able to be alone.
PERRY: Why?
WILLIAM: I wish you could learn how.
PERRY: You want your own space.
WILLIAM: It’s fair enough, I think.
PERRY: It is not fair.
WILLIAM: Who am I?
PERRY: Will.
WILLIAM: Will. I am Will. You are Perry.
PERRY: And?
WILLIAM: Two names. Two people.
PERRY: Perry and Will.
WILLIAM: Yes.
PERRY: Who doesn’t call us that?
WILLIAM: No one.
PERRY: Everyone we know. Perry and Will is what we’re called. Because you asked for this, you planned it. A lifetime ago. You wanted us together. You wanted us as one.
WILLIAM: I want it still.
PERRY: No. You’re trying to get revenge.
WILLIAM: Revenge?
PERRY: Revenge.
WILLIAM: How?
PERRY: You think that in some way I’m going to leave you again. You’re pushing me away because you’re scared. Like you always do.
WILLIAM: No. I’m not scared.
PERRY: You’re scared. You think I’ll go off with someone again. You think I’ll be more interested in my new Grandbaby. That little what’s-her-name.
WILLIAM: I’m not scared. Back then- Maggie- she was important. You loved her like you love me. But not the new Grandbaby. You’ll love her, and that’s okay because it’s a different kind of love.
PERRY: You’re one selfish son of a bitch. I didn’t want to come here. I didn’t want to. You made me come around the world. You convinced me I had to—your last hurrah. If you wanted the space, you didn’t need to bring me here with you. I could have stayed with her!
WILLIAM: You want me just as much as I want you, Pear. Listen.
PERRY: You decided. Your decisions. "I decided that I want to cut out the most important person in my life." Lovely.
WILLIAM: Don’t put words in my mouth. I’m not in the mood today.
PERRY: You want me out. Fuck you.
WILLIAM: Perry!
PERRY: I’m broken. I broke because of your fickle, selfish self. What were we doing on New Year’s Day? Fourth of July? March...16th? I know. We were probably sitting. Our apartment. My daughter’s house. The lake. We were sitting—me to your Right, you to my Left. If I need to go to the doctor, you drive me. If you go, I drive you. We can both drive. Why not drive ourselves? You’re a crutch.
WILLIAM: I’m a crutch. You could do everything you do all alone. You don’t need company to function. I can spend a day reading on the porch, and you can go to the doctor. Take another trip to Perth in your mind. It is more pleasant together sometimes. Sometimes I love to be around you. Most times, I love you. Always. I just want ten minutes now and again.
PERRY: Stop.
WILLIAM: No! You got your turn to talk and call me names. Let me explain.
PERRY: I feel weird.
WILLIAM: You feel "tired and exhausted and woozy." Call me melodramatic? Look at yourself, Perry. You’re moving about this place like a lunatic. On days like today, I wish there was something else for the two of us. Sometimes I wish Maggie were here to take care of you so that I could have one god damn day with the rest of the family!
No. I don’t wish that, because this- Hey. Look at me.
PERRY sees him.
This isn’t new, you know. I’m sorry that you hurt yourself, but don’t try and blame it on me. It just isn’t fair—you and me. We’ve got three beautiful little grandchildren. The boys, a girl you like to call Honeydew, and another popping out soon.
I love you.
PERRY: Sweetheart.
WILLIAM: It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s okay.
PERRY: What can I do? I’m going to clean this up. Put away my things.
WILLIAM: It’s okay.
PERRY: I’m here. Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere. I’m here. I’ll just hang these up really quickly.
PERRY takes a few things into the other room.
I’ve just realized that neither of us has eaten, have we? Maybe we can cook up some steak and potatoes?
WILLIAM: That sounds great.
PERRY: I’ll make the gravy the way you like it. Like when we were kids.
WILLIAM: Great. I’ll call Kaylin and have her bring over some pigs in a blanket.
PERRY re-enter and does not take his place beside WILLIAM. He moves about the apartment.
PERRY: Kaylin?
WILLIAM: She just called me about fifteen minutes ago.
PERRY: I thought we were done with all of that, William.
WILLIAM: I’m sorry?
PERRY: Who is this ‘Kaylin’?
WILLIAM: Pear?
PERRY: I know I don’t have the right to be jealous... I know. I messed up. I know I’m not allowed to, but it still hurts me, Will.
WILLIAM: No-
PERRY: I just. Look, I don’t want to meet that person. If you’re - involved with each other. I don’t want to mee them. Okay?
WILLIAM: Okay.
PERRY: …Marguerite at the front desk sent a boy up to help you with your luggage today. Did you have everything? Did you enjoy the beach?
WILLIAM: …
THE END
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